written in early february:

January was my most consistent if not profitable month to date. Coming into the month, I had to goals in mind: get out of makeup, and become ranked in top 1000 players on Pocketfives. Because I was on winter break from school, I had three weeks to grind and achieve these goals. Well, its February 5th and I’m proud to say I have accomplished both goals. Although being ranked on P5s is sort of a silly, volume-based statistic, I’m still happy to be ranked 960th, although I’m sure this will dip in the near future as I have to resume my studies at school. Anyway, in January I made 11 final tables. Unfortunately, the only one I won was the smallest I was at, a $27.50 capped tournament for $1700. Nonetheless, I had some other decent scores, including a second place in the 20c for $7100 and third in the $75 ko for $4700. Also, I was in two team contests in January, both a low-stakes and mid-stakes one. Because all of my teammates were amazing (Roi Rogers & BIPODDDDD), I ended up on both victorious teams and that netted me around $4k more total!
Anyway, I ran well throughout the month, and fought through some final table bubbles halfway through where I was concerned I had missed my chance at a heater. Fortunately, despite these bubbles I managed to finish out the month strong and make a few more FTs. Don’t get me wrong, this was definitely a heater, but I still think I’ve adjusted my game pretty well in the last few months and have slowed down considerably, no longer trying to force myself to play as laggy as possible and run over the table just because I have chips. I’ve been trying to pick spots better and not just make moves because I can.

Finally, after getting out of makeup my backers and I decided to part ways. This was a mutual decision that we’d been leaning towards for awhile. For them, having a horse who could only play once or twice a week, mostly on Sundays (because of commitments to grad school), didn’t represent the best investment possible. Likewise, I grew tired of giving up half my profits, mostly earned from my bread & butter midstakes, just so I could take a few shots every Sunday at the higher buyins. So as of last week I am now playing on my own and giving it a shot. I’m going to drop down in stakes for a bit and probably max out at the $55s and $10rs for now, just so I can build some confidence even though I can afford to play higher stakes. I’ll be selling packages to more expensive tournaments/most Sundays to help fight the stress of higher buyins. So far I’ve done two packages and they were bought up fairly quickly, which is a good sign. My goal is to find some variance busters that will help me avoid the massive swings of huge field mtts. Thanks to the advice of Jalman, I’m going to try out capped tournaments, MTT SNGS, and grinding tons of satellites. We’ll see how it goes…

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Written this morning:

I didn’t play much in February and my results are indicative of that. I only put in 6 sessions, and overall finished down about $1500, though because I sold pieces of myself a few times, I think actually lost about $500 of my own money. When I don’t play and have time to think about my game I tend to get anxious about my situation. A few months ago when I was busy with school work, all I would think about was trying to get out of makeup and play on my own. Now that I’m on my own and being relatively dormant in a poker sense, I’m thinking about how desirable being backed looks like. The grass is always greener… I’ve been unbacked for probably 80% of my poker career, but the last 20% has been the most recent, so I’ve been viewing everything from a backed players perspective of late. Being forced to pass up good opportunities such as playing the Warmup, 163s, 30rs, and future COOP/FTOPS events doesnt sit well with me. Of course, I can and probably will sell action, but its never fun to sit on the bench and watch opportunities that you once had pass you by. I think I’ll get less anxious about the situation once I can put in more volume, since like I said, I’m my own worst enemy when I let my mind wander.
What results did I actually have in February? Hmm lets see, not much to write home about. 4th in a $27ko for $1400, 9th in the $26 35k, 10th in a small $25 on UB, and dual 11ths on the same day in the $17 superturbo KO and $26 superstack. Anywho, I should have some more time to play in March, since I have spring break during miniftops and my weekends are a little less busy than the last month.
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What was I doing in February when I wasnt playing? Celebrating Superbowl Sunday at my friend’s apartment in Brooklyn and Valentine’s Day with my wonderful girlfriend (we got each other tickets to see Louis C.K standup and a Citizen Cope concert). My girlfriend’s school friends from Boston also came to NYC so I hung out with them one weekend, and this past weekend a few of us went to the Poconos. I tried out skiing for the first time ever which was an interesting experience. My family was never into cold weather activities, so I somehow went 24 years without ever trying skiing, snowboarding, etc. The most I had done was sledding on a snow day in elementary school. Anyway, I was worried that because I had never done it before, my 1 hour lesson would leave me surrounded by a bunch of 6 year olds, but fortunately they put a bunch of n00bie adults together to try out the bunnie slope. After a quick lesson I went down the hill and quickly found myself going wayyyyy too fast and unable to stop. I was told the pizza method would work, but when youre going down hill on your first run ever it definitely does not. As I was careening down the hill with tons of little kids at the bottom I decided to abandon ship and fall on my ass to make sure I didnt kill anyone. It was scary but exhilarating and I got right back on the lift to give it a second shot. On my second run I once again picked up way too much speed and started losing control, unable to stop. I guess the ski instructor saw what was happening and bolted after me…he caught up and told me to cut all the way to the side so my skis would be facing the top of the mountain and it ended up working. After that I got the hang of it and made a few more runs before I met up with my other friends who were on the more advanced slopes. Overall I probably only did about 5-7 runs but for my first time I’d say that was enough. I could see myself skiing once or twice a winter but its hard to say if ill ever get hardcore into it.

i guess thats it for now, stay tuned for more :)