I really kinda wanna get this out there just to give noobs something to mull over before they take the plunge of playing poker all day/ night. I've realized more and more recently just how much time I've spent over the last 4 years playing poker, and now that poker is gone, I'm also starting to see just how much it may have impacted my life. I certainly cant say it had a negative impact, but even with the money, I cant say it had a tremendously GOOD impact on my life either.

I started playing poker when I was 19 just out of high school in 2005 (held behind a year because of my hearing for those wonder if 4th grade was a good 3 years for me). I decided to work for a year after high school to save money before going to college. Long story short, had about $8k saved up for college before finding coke, again thats a different story done and over with but never did go to college. (Back to that later)

Of course I was new to the game and could think of nothing but truckloads of money being dumped into my bank account. All I had to do was shove all in with nothing like the guys on TV and I'd win, right? Obviously, I lost. I started out playing cash but eventually realized that tournaments were my thing. I played for about a year before I slowly started becoming successful at it. I lost a lot of hard earned money to start off, but I still do to a point, grin when I think that I learned to be successful by losing my own money, never had coaching, never looked at poker forums- I learned everything I knew on my own and I learned the hard way. After my 1st real taste of success, I had no plan of stopping, only of playing more and more until I finally could quit my job and play full time. That was 5 years ago.

I started to read books and look at others thought processes that were posted in sites like P5s and 2+2, and started to steadily get better. I ran like god for 4 days in 2009, and won $17,000 in 3 mtts. I was hungry for more. (looking back I left $38,000 on the table, 1 of the FTs being the double deuce on FTP with a misclick for 8th)

I started getting regularly backed in 2010 and some of 2011, and I played at least 5 days a week. I loved poker, and would stop at nothing to become a beast. Keep in mind, I pour concrete for a living, I bust my sorry ass every day and most of the time work 5 12s and 10 on saturday. Yet I always found a way to pound a 15-18 hour session on sundays. I'd come home exhausted during the week and play for 7-10 hours. Did I call in sick? Once in the last 2 years.

I became consumed with the insatiable desire to be able to quit my job, do what I wanted to, have a lot of money, and play for a living. I generally ignored my wife pleading for me to just go hang out with her, just dont play this sunday, you've played every sunday 3 months straight, and I ignored my family. I've missed a lot of little things that I'd like to remember, a lot of times where my family would just sit around and grill and bullshit, and tbh, I think my relationship with my wife could be 10 times stronger than it is right now without poker.

My marriage is not in shambles by any means, but I also know that a lot of nights she went out with her girlfriends, she had always asked me to hang out with her before she walked out of the room disappointed and then phone her friends. I sometimes wonder if our relationship hadnt been so strong from the start would she still be here? She waited 6 months for me while I was doing some time 4 hours away while she worked full time AND went to school full time yet she was there every single week. Corporals said they'd never seen any one person there every week to visit someone.

Anyway, now we get to this year- now I'm playing roughly 30-40 hours a week while I still pull 60 hour weeks at my job. I went to work on roughly 3 hours of sleep 3 or 4 days a week. I had made my decision that if I wasnt pro by the end of this year I was dropping it and finally going to school. I'd come home at 7 shower, grab a bag of doritos and mountain dew, and play until 3 or 4 in the morning (later if made a FT) and wake up at 6am for work. I didnt care, I wanted SO badly to play for a living, I didnt care what it would take. I got a private backing/ coaching deal from a group of 4 investors who all play for a living. I cash for $14.7k in 2 weeks with them, 2 weeks into the coaching deal I take down a 56k for $11.4k. If I hit 1 more big score, work was done. 1 week later BF hits, say no more.

In the past 4 years, I've been a successful player. In 5000 mtts played across 4 sites (bdog Pstars FTP and carbon) I have $135k in cashes, and about $45k in profit. I enjoy playing poker. I enjoy having a decent cushion in the bank if something happens in life and I have a big unexpected expense. Was it worth it? ....I dont know. The money on the side is nice, but its also a helluva hassle with taxes. It sucks now looking back at how much I missed in life. A lot of friends I had years ago, I rarely talk to now.

Poker is time consuming, and I lost a lot of friends because of it, and have spent the last 6 months repairing the relationship I have with family and my wife. If poker comes back, will I play again? Yes. But I didnt go to college because I was chasing my poker pipe dream, and now look at where I'm at- making $14 an hour busting my ass pouring concrete. When its 10 degrees out with a 20 mph wind, I'm out there. When its 120 heat index in the summer, I'm out there. This isnt what I want to do with my life, but its where I'm at.

I finally sent in my application at a local community college here for welding, and hope to get something back from them soon. If poker comes back soon, I will play, but definitely not to the degree that I used to. I need to get a degree before chasing the poker dream again. Dont drop out of school to play poker full time, poker wont last forever, once I have a degree 2-3 years from now, then it may be possible to give poker as a possible career 1 more shot. Until then, I'll wait

Lesson: Play cash games.

everyone measures success differently,for me grinding micro to low stakes is a huge improvement over my job.... poker has given me a ton of freedom that i previosly never had working paycheck to paycheck. Yes your friendships will suffer if you grind long hours but for me it was worth it. If you keep a normal schedule and balance life its the same as working a 9-5

thanks for sharing your story, i would add/agree that most people are not cut out for the poker lifestyle. many people will struggle to balance poker with other 'normal life' things. best of luck in your future endeavors (whether they include poker or not).

 

Originally Posted by tedSTRETCH

everyone measures success differently,for me grinding micro to low stakes is a huge improvement over my job.... poker has given me a ton of freedom that i previosly never had working paycheck to paycheck. Yes your friendships will suffer if you grind long hours but for me it was worth it. If you keep a normal schedule and balance life its the same as working a 9-5

This part is very true, but remember I dont have the real life roll yet to play poker full time and still be able to sustain the sometimes monthlong downswings. The bolded was where I wanted to get to, because once I finally succeeded my life could have been MUCH more balanced. W/o enough money in the bank to quit my job tho, obv had no choice but to continue playing hoping to hit big enough to quit my irl job. Until that happened I couldnt quit, and I was never able to....hence the unbalanced life

Donnie, we love and we miss you! Can't wait for the date when we are back to crushing and biting my nails when u 5bet jam in a tourny we took a shot on because we knew and believed you could win it :)

 

Originally Posted by MakeMeMaster

I asked the taxi to go reverse on my memory lane and I never remember you crushing. What am I missing???

I refer to "we" as the people I talked to on a regular basis. Kinda like people talk about the Packers or their favorite team and refer to them as "we" ex: "we are gonna win this sunday" get it?

I did crush a daily double FT one time too. Maybe a 3r or 10r. So, yes I did crushhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh at one point in time. Congrats on your successful ride tho. Not too sure what I ever did to get trolled on here

 

Originally Posted by MakeMeMaster

I think you should use "you" then. Would fit in the sentence much better. Correct English grammar is important man.

It would fit in the....**

Nice picture to post on Vet's day Makememaster .... what a cock head

hahahaha your life has come down to berating other players on P5's then disrespecting people who have served a coountry on Vet's day ... your life = "cool story bro"

First of all MMM, that is way out of line.

Good post OP. I find myself relating to alot of what you say. Glad too hear you are repairing important relationships in your life.

Gl in your future endeavors.