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OMG, ABSOLUTLY RIDICULOUS!!!!1

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  1. emufart69 emufart69 is offline

    New Zealand

    Posts: 38
    Joined: Dec 06

    Dec 23rd, 2006 (12/23/2006 4:43pm)

    So im sitting at the .10/.25 at pokerstars.

    Im first to act and look down at my hand OMG pocket hearts 2, 7 suited my hand moves slowly toward my penis as i smell a massive win, and also the fart i let rip earlier. I've got the preflop nuts as it known on the streets. I press the time button allowing me 60 seconds to remove my clothes and go for a cheeky pube fondle. I limp in hope that some n00b will raise me, so that i can re-raise them, representing a really strong hand like k-10 sooooted. so anyway, some absolute retard raises me LOL!!!1. This guy has just joined the table so i immediatly put him on 2, 6 w000t! wtf is he thinking?!?! ROFL! I decide to smooth call, setting a trap because he is dominated. I say to him "you are dominted mate mate LOL" he replies "no way I've got u monstered" ahah what a crap comeback I could eat a bowl of alphabet soup and shit a better comeback than that. the flop comes down AcKcQc lol im miles ahead! I decide to bet really small in hopes of luring him into my trap... he raises me the pot! ROFLMAO!!!11!!11! what a n00b, I let my 15 seconds count down to make him believe im thinking about folding, then i smooth call so fast he gets aids! the turn is the 2d! i reach over and grab a paper towel to clean the come off my screen ive hit the nuts and my nuts are going wild .... this time i decide to over bet the pot, and go all-in so that i only get called by hands better than mine. which if you n00bs don't already know, is the best strategy in NLHE. So anyway, this freaking idiot calls me with Jc10c! unbelievable! He can't even fold a hand. I represented the five of a kind the whole way down. So the river is the 9s. Straight away i finger my bum, realising that this card hasn't improved his hand at all. But by the time I reach my colon, I see that pokerstars has pushed the pot towards the n00b. WTF!?!?//1 man i hate it when fish get paid off on badly played hands.
     
  2. DexterCain DexterCain is offline

    Posts: 13,456
    Joined: Aug 05

    Dec 23rd, 2006 (12/23/2006 8:37pm) in reply to emufart69

  3. Wretchy Wretchy is offline whatslogic

    Las Vegas, NV
    United States

    Posts: 5,570
    Joined: Dec 05

    Dec 23rd, 2006 (12/23/2006 9:03pm) in reply to emufart69

    gfy gtfo
     
  4. waltchilla waltchilla is offline

    Lexington, KY
    United States

    Posts: 333
    Joined: Jan 06

    Dec 23rd, 2006 (12/23/2006 9:48pm) in reply to emufart69

    you deserve to die for this

    and all of OT is laughing at you
  5. TimeForPT TimeForPT is offline

    Regina
    Canada

    Posts: 945
    Joined: Dec 06

    Dec 23rd, 2006 (12/23/2006 10:44pm) in reply to emufart69

    Wow, how old are you? 12?
  6. FabulousTexan FabulousTexan is offline

    Ocala, FL
    United States

    Posts: 381
    Joined: Apr 06

    Dec 24th, 2006 (12/24/2006 6:15am) in reply to emufart69

    Drugs are bad
  7. jtown1010 jtown1010 is offline

    United States

    Posts: 23,112
    Joined: Jan 06

    Dec 24th, 2006 (12/24/2006 7:18am) in reply to FabulousTexan

    I thought it was pretty funny, some of the terminology made me LOL.
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