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Few quick funny stories from living in the red light district

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  1. jalman1 jalman1 is offline

    Posts: 6,451
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    Oct 20th, 2010 (10/20/2010 9:54pm)

    i dont post much around here anymore but meh its 20 degrees outside its hailing/raining so im shut in for the night here. Ive been living in the red light district for like the past 3 weeks here in my one of my favorite citys amsterdam and figured meh im bored might as well post a few quick stories (im not in the best state of mind so my story telling may not be great)


    1. so i had just gotten back from the coffee shop a few days ago when i went down a alley populated with window girls(near my place). in this area of town u can take pictures of the artwork of the fronts of the live sex show places but 1 thing i learned was do not ever try and take a picture of these girls...these girls dont care about taking dick after dick but when it comes to taking there picture they will fight u as i got to find out. One guy whos with his wife trys to snap a picture of this 1 hooker (this was a serious tuesday morning uggo) and she comes out of the booth and throws him to the wall stunning him she is cursing at him in dutch before he eventually runs out of there.

    2. So i had just woken up from a pretty bad day binging at like 9pm so i went to go get some food. was walking out of my apartment when i see a really cute girl waiting to be let in. i open up the door and she starts talking to me "oh hey how are u doing" i was a bit stunned by the random chat but kinda just was like im doing good how are u etc before i started walking on my way and out the door to go grub. she looks at me and says where the hell r u going. im obviously way confused by this until my neighbor runs down the stairs and is like lol sorry about that i called for u not him.

    meh there r others but u tend to forget alot of the things that go on in this part of the world
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  2. Dunhills1 Dunhills1 is offline

    Toronto
    Canada

    Posts: 238
    Joined: Mar 07

    Oct 20th, 2010 (10/20/2010 10:17pm) in reply to jalman1

    WP. You are living my dream. Greenhouse Namaste and Bluebird are 2 of my faves.
  3. Mr323 Mr323 is offline

    Saratoga Springs, NY
    United States

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    Oct 20th, 2010 (10/20/2010 10:21pm) in reply to jalman1

    Ok.

    So, get some Mcnuggets with extra packs of sauce, and get a cutie to sauce up ur taint, and have her lick it off.
    Demand a shamrock shake, add some rum, and cover the hired cutie in it and have a tongue field day.

    That is it for my ideas, I'm tired.
  4. duclover duclover is offline

    Woodstock, IL
    United States

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    Oct 20th, 2010 (10/20/2010 10:27pm) in reply to Mr323

    lol. Love it. After I graduated from college I went to Amsterdam for a week. Fun, crazy time for sure. Still have my Barney's sticker on my Keef box I bought in Amsterdam. Engraved on box is "Resin Heaven"

    Share more stories, please
  5. jalman1 jalman1 is offline

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    Oct 20th, 2010 (10/20/2010 11:13pm) in reply to Dunhills1

     
    Originally Posted by Dunhills1 View Post

    WP. You are living my dream. Greenhouse Namaste and Bluebird are 2 of my faves.

    yeah greenhouse is about a 3 min walk from my place. they have quite the selection to choose from and some of the better stuff ive seen, but its to packed for my tastes since everybody knows what a good place it is to go to
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  6. Mr Galt Mr Galt is offline sister-in-law's a ho

    Overland Park, KS
    United States

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    Oct 20th, 2010 (10/20/2010 11:22pm) in reply to jalman1

    (x) underwhelmed. please try again
  7. dolphin13 dolphin13 is offline OT Vice MVP

    Chicago, IL
    United States

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    Oct 20th, 2010 (10/20/2010 11:34pm) in reply to Mr Galt

    where are the funny stories?

    if you don't have anything, just make some shit up. we wont know the difference
  8. KING KING is offline

    Suwanee, GA
    United States

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    Oct 20th, 2010 (10/20/2010 11:56pm) in reply to jalman1

     
    Originally Posted by jalman1 View Post

    1. so i had just gotten back from the coffee shop a few days ago when i went down a alley populated with window girls(near my place). in this area of town u can take pictures of the artwork of the fronts of the live sex show places but 1 thing i learned was do not ever try and take a picture of these girls...these girls dont care about taking dick after dick but when it comes to taking there picture they will fight u as i got to find out. One guy whos with his wife trys to snap a picture of this 1 hooker (this was a serious tuesday morning uggo) and she comes out of the booth and throws him to the wall stunning him she is cursing at him in dutch before he eventually runs out of there.

    Seems a lot like this one part of Catch-22 where Yossarian is watching his friend get beat by a pregnant whore in the streets while he's laughing at her
  9. kidrockin kidrockin is offline cro magnon

    Yeniky
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    Oct 20th, 2010 (10/20/2010 11:56pm) in reply to dolphin13

    nerd alert ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^X2
     
  10. hostile hostile is offline

    Revelstoke
    Canada

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    Oct 20th, 2010 (10/20/2010 11:59pm) in reply to kidrockin

    I've been to Amsterdam 3 times and have way better stories than that.
  11. AMARTIN1181 AMARTIN1181 is offline

    New Haven, CT
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    Oct 21st, 2010 (10/21/2010 12:00am) in reply to hostile

    i feel unfulfilled
  12. jalman1 jalman1 is offline

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    Oct 21st, 2010 (10/21/2010 12:02am) in reply to AMARTIN1181

    ha yeah actually dolphin is right there not funny at all just stories about living in a weird ass place that has some even stranger views on what is and isnt accepted. i cant find a place that has a us/europe electrical converter but there r 30 different places in a few block radius for me to buy S&M stuff.

    meh i have better stories but doubt i post anything to bad my parents read this site cuz i play poker ugh beat

    guess ill go back to hiding now
    Edited By: jalman1 Oct 21st, 2010 at 12:07 AM
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  13. AMARTIN1181 AMARTIN1181 is offline

    New Haven, CT
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    Oct 21st, 2010 (10/21/2010 12:08am) in reply to jalman1

    how many women have u paid for sex... out with it young man
  14. BulldogCafe BulldogCafe is offline

    Barrie
    Canada

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    Oct 21st, 2010 (10/21/2010 12:15am) in reply to AMARTIN1181

    i'm passing through on the morning of nov 10. i only have a few hours, so i'll prob either hit barneys or the greenhouse. i know the area fairly well, so hit me up and we'll get blazed.
  15. wild_ride wild_ride is offline

    Isle of Man

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    Oct 21st, 2010 (10/21/2010 12:42am) in reply to BulldogCafe

    f*ck you for not letting me know you are in amsterdam, just wait till i see you in IM and ill make you stick some febo down there

    :)

    p.s having said that i lived there for 6 months so you will have way more funny stories to tell or post as times goes on
  16. UncleLeo UncleLeo is offline

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    Oct 21st, 2010 (10/21/2010 12:44am) in reply to BulldogCafe

    So I'm in Amsterdam and I see this chick and I'm like hey, and she says hey back. Then I go on my way, get some food, and go to bed.
  17. AMARTIN1181 AMARTIN1181 is offline

    New Haven, CT
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    Oct 21st, 2010 (10/21/2010 12:46am) in reply to UncleLeo

     
    Originally Posted by UncleLeo View Post

    So I'm in Amsterdam and I see this chick and I'm like hey, and she says hey back. Then I go on my way, get some food, and go to bed.

    wp
  18. RATE615 RATE615 is offline

    Nashville, TN
    United States

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    Oct 21st, 2010 (10/21/2010 1:04am) in reply to jalman1

     
    Originally Posted by jalman1 View Post

    ha yeah actually dolphin is right there not funny at all just stories about living in a weird ass place that has some even stranger views on what is and isnt accepted. i cant find a place that has a us/europe electrical converter but there r 30 different places in a few block radius for me to buy S&M stuff.

    meh i have better stories but doubt i post anything to bad my parents read this site cuz i play poker ugh beat

    guess ill go back to hiding now

    LOL @ not posting much and hiding. You have over 6k posts.
  19. jalman1 jalman1 is offline

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    Oct 21st, 2010 (10/21/2010 1:10am) in reply to RATE615

     
    Originally Posted by RATE615 View Post

    LOL @ not posting much and hiding. You have over 6k posts.


    6250 posts and i think 6k of them were made in 1 summer in 2006....i came in the weird time in ot where alot of the very first posters stopped posting in a tight nit group on a consistent basis. when i browse this forum now i only recognize about 10 % of the names but i always sucked with names anyways blah hate being the guy posting in his own thread especially a crappy 1

    off to sleep its 2am gn


    and unclegeos cliffnotes r pretty awesome
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  20. duclover duclover is offline

    Woodstock, IL
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    Oct 21st, 2010 (10/21/2010 1:11am) in reply to jalman1

    Was anyone else lost the entire time you were in town??? I remember being lost, all of the time. I also remember, going through security in Amsterdam, the agen saying "do you have any drugs on you". I laughed and said, " you really think I'm that stupid? Heading back to the US from Amsterdam w.drugs.". Then I did my laundry and couldnt believe the shit I found in the pockets of all of my pants I brought home. Thank god nobody searched my luggage on that flight
  21. OGPokerman OGPokerman is offline

    La Quinta, CA
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    Oct 21st, 2010 (10/21/2010 1:12am) in reply to duclover

    this thread failed...wtf

    There has to be other stories of you rich guys heading to amsterdam. I am suprised there isnt a realitiy show about amsterdam on showtime.
    Edited By: OGPokerman Oct 21st, 2010 at 01:14 AM
     
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