[x]

See Where You Rank in Virginia

  1. so talking to ecu had this story of my teen years pop into my head of just how naively I was raised.

    I was thirteen at the time and I had to use the restroom. My sister had just walked out of it. I go in and there's blood in the toliet. I finish my buisness and go to my mom and say "mom I think amandas on drugs cuz there's blood in the toliet." She just looks at me and says "well I'll just have to have a talk with her." I didn't figure out what was really goin on til three years later when I was goin down on a girl and went to clean up and my face was covered in blood and juice and walked back out and asked "I think I cut you or something" she asked "why and told her about the blood and she laughed and said "it was her time of the month." After the stupid expression on my face told her I didn't understand we had a talk.

    so yea lol
    Add tekiller to Rail
  2. thought you died of tequila poisoning dude

    good to see u

    man u were sheltered lol
     
    Add kidrockin to Rail
  3. In b4 cock sniffing
    Add bigwillie20 to Rail
  4. Add Sandman_Good to Rail
  5. When I was 11-12, I used to watch that scrambled porn on the nudy channel. Sometimes you could make out what was going on pretty well. Everytime they would start to go at it doggystyle, I would always think they were doing it in the butt. I had no idea you could access girly parts from the back like that.
    Add LizardBoy to Rail
  6. This one time, in band camp...
    Add murderer to Rail
  7. I was 69ing one time when I was 15-16 and the girl went to rearrange her arm and pushed to hard on my stomach and I farted right in her nose. Not my finest moment.
    Add ptownbrad to Rail
  8.  
    Originally Posted by murderer View Post

    This one time, in band camp...

    we dont wanna know about your flute experience..
    Add BigA524 to Rail
  9.  
    Originally Posted by ptownbrad View Post

    I was 69ing one time when I was 15-16 and the girl went to rearrange her arm and pushed to hard on my stomach and I farted right in her nose. Not my finest moment.

    you sir, have some funny stories to tell.
    Add MasturNate to Rail
  10. another period story:

    when I was 13, most of my friends were starting to get their first period/already had started and I still hadn't gotten mine. So I convinced myself that I could be pregnant from the toilet seat b/c at the time we were renting a house while our new one was being built so I had to share a bathroom with my brother. So for about 6 months, I wouldn't use the toilet without cleaning the seat.
    Add tennisee to Rail
  11. In 9th grade I had to walk through the cafeteria to get to one of my afternoon classes. I was running late one day. When I reached the cafeteria doors I noticed the entire Varsity Football team was in the cafeteria having study hall before practice.

    It was so quiet in the cafeteria you could hear a pin drop. As I walked through someone yelled out "Flat chested!" The laughter erupted. I threw up my middle finger & kept walking. I burst into tears as soon as I got out of there though.

    High school boys suck.
    Add TexasGal to Rail
  12. I'm not the star of the story but this is still pretty epic IMO.

    My senior year of HS, lunch period. We convince this kid Ray to take a bet that he can't drink a gallon of milk during lunch. He accepts and we line up like 32 milk cartons in front of him and he starts drinking. He is like 2/3 done when he has to run to the garbage and pukes. We decide that since we didn't say he couldn't throw up to win the bet it still counts if he finishes (This was for like $5 + the cost of milk lol). He gets back to the table and finishes the last carton of milk as the bell rings and we have to leave the cafeteria.

    The cafeteria is in the basement and you have to go up two long flights of stairs to get to the high school classroom area. Keep in mind there are about 250 or so kids trying to fit up the same small set of stairs, including Ray. Ray got about half way up the first flight of stairs when every sphincter muscle in his ass gave way at once and he had most of the milk and whatever else had been in his stomach come out uncontrollably and ran down the inside of his jeans and start pouring out the bottom of his pant leg. One of the most disgusting things I've ever seen and to see the girls freak out when they realized they were walking in human milk-shit was absolutely epic. Ray panicked and started to run up the stairs which only made the situation worse for him since this expedited the fluid leaving his body. It was a small enough school that within about 15 minutes every student and teacher had found out about his accident and were quick to rub it in his face, even the teachers were laughing at him as he walked down the hall later that day in his gym clothes.
    Add bjybjy to Rail
  13. so'd you ever grow any tits, there, pancakes?
    Add cdmalgee to Rail
  14.  
    Originally Posted by cdmalgee View Post

    so'd you ever grow any tits, there, pancakes?

    Bully
    Add towman1 to Rail
  15. lmao
    Thread StarterAdd tekiller to Rail
  16.  
    Originally Posted by tennisee View Post


    when I was 13, most of my friends were starting to get their first period/already had started and I still hadn't gotten mine. So I convinced myself that I could be pregnant from the toilet seat b/c at the time we were renting a house while our new one was being built so I had to share a bathroom with my brother. So for about 6 months, I wouldn't use the toilet without cleaning the seat.

    I reread that post 2-3 times trying to make sense of it because I was under the assumption you were a guy. I guess I never click on profiles.
    Add 1.21Gigawatts to Rail
  17.  
    Originally Posted by towman1 View Post

    Bully

    I reread your post 2-3 times trying to make sense of it because I was under the impression you were a guy.
    Add 1.21Gigawatts to Rail
  18.  
    Originally Posted by towman1 View Post


    Bully

    I know. I felt terrible typing it. iirc, though - we've seen her on a boat in a bikini top and they've come in nicely since then. I'd certainly be more than willing to "tap dat ass", so consider it pulling on a pigtail type of flirting. Only meaner, lol.

    Could just be my instinct to see weakness and pounce. Who knows?
    Add cdmalgee to Rail
  19. I was 17 and driving a dump truck at the steel mill on weekends. Late one nite, i had a load of bricks on from the open hearth and took them to the dump. After emptying the box, i lowered it down and tried to secure the tailgate but it wouldnt close. When i went to the back of the truck, i noticed that a brick was lodged between the tailgate and the box. Being the wise 17yr old that i was, i scooped the brick out of the way with my hand and the tailgate slammed shut trapping two fingers. It was kinda painful and rather amazing that i could lift the tailgate with my free hand to escape with a minor injury.

    Moral of the story, when you're 17 and out late at nite, be careful where you put your fingers and for god sakes dont get them stuck in somebody's box at the dump.
    Add saxman to Rail
  20. <TABLE border=0 cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=6 width="100%"><TBODY><TR><TD><TABLE border=0 cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=0 width="100%"><TBODY><TR><TD>by whitealroker on 4/20/2007 22:52 </TD><TD><TABLE border=0 cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=0><TBODY><TR><TD><TABLE border=0 cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=0><TBODY><TR><TD></TD><TD></TD></TR><TR><TD></TD><TD></TD></TR></TBODY></TABLE></TD></TR></TBODY></TABLE></TD></TR></TBODY></TABLE></TD></TR><TR><TD><TABLE border=0 cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=2 width="100%"><TBODY><TR><TD>I was about 13 and spent much of my weekends at a church youth camp. Lot of boring religous shit but also alot of fun too. I have had been getting sexy thoughts and was first starting to realize was changing in some ways. anyway we are at a camp further from home then usual and it was such a long trip we didnt get there till after dark(it was still april and was quite cold).

    The next morning we had breakfest and the counslers announce that we had some free time before activitys. this camp was in the mountians and was quite foggy that morning. I wander off with my two friends and forget reason but wound up alone after a while and a little lost. I'm pretty good with geography and knew direction i was headed would either run into main highway or camp road so wasnt worried. I came to a split rail fence. didnt occur to me could be something on other side so i crossed it. the woods became less and less dense till all of the sudden I was in a large field. it was still quite foggy so i couldnt see too far ahead.

    As I was walking I saw a white shape in the distance. as i got closer the shape became clearer and clearer. It's white body in the fog looked wonderful. she was the most beautiful think i've ever seen. she seemed happy to have the company and wasnt that much bigger then me so I wasnt worried. as i got closer she went bllleahhhhh like she was calling me. I could tell she wanted me and I wanted her too. I was still young so I didnt know what wanted meant exactly but my body knew what to do better then me and.........

    ....it was wonderful. I'd never felt so complete in my life at the time and I'll never forget my weekend in the campground with the nickname &quot;the land of llamado&quot; </TD></TR></TBODY></TABLE></TD></TR></TBODY></TABLE>
    Add whitealroker to Rail
  21.  
    Originally Posted by 1.21Gigawatts View Post


    I reread your post 2-3 times trying to make sense of it because I was under the impression you were a guy.

    OMG I have been outed I am the worlds 1st internet guy acting like a guy I just havent figured out why I am doing it
    Add towman1 to Rail
  22. pm me the bikini pic plz
    Add norcaljeff to Rail
  23. welcome back tekiller~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Add p00pymcp00perton to Rail
  24. pm? that wouldn't be fair to the super n00bs (although they all deserve death. GTFO)



    I remembered it because she looks EXACTLY like one of my ex-gf's with the shades on. It's the hips and the &quot;I'm only smiling for a picture, I'm not actually this happy&quot; smile. Hey TX - you remind me of a spiteful whore I used to know. (but you seem nice )

    As you can see, while she may not be as well endowed as her friend, she in fact does have lovely, well proportioned tatas.
    Add cdmalgee to Rail
  25. Add Hughes4 to Rail
  26. 1,2
    Add locustbend to Rail
  27. When I was like 14 years old my dad woke me up in the middle of the night to go start his truck for work. Middle of winter outside of Toledo, OH at 3 am. SO i run out there in my shorts and snowmobile coat freezing my a$$ off, it's about 5 degrees. I am half asleep and just open the truck door reach in (standing on the ground) to start the truck. At this time I realize its a stick shift so my dumb a$$ (half asleep) reaches down and presses the clutch with one hand and turn ignition with the other. The truck starts jumps in gear as i release the clutch and plows right through the front wall of our garage.....

    The absolute worst part was trying to explain it to my Dad who was not happy. It was a long morning after that!
    Add locustbend to Rail
  28.  
    Originally Posted by LizardBoy View Post

    When I was 11-12, I used to watch that scrambled porn on the nudy channel. Sometimes you could make out what was going on pretty well. Everytime they would start to go at it doggystyle, I would always think they were doing it in the butt. I had no idea you could access girly parts from the back like that.

    lol i always used to think the same thing to. as for my own stories, lets see

    - my two best friends and i participated in a district wide Academic Olympics competition...it was a two-part competition, so in between the two parts we all had to piss... one of my friends had to take a shit, I finish taking a leak, and leave. My other friend and I wait FOREVER for him...he comes out and is clearly not right, and has a brown stain on his shirt...apparently he ran out of toilet paper, and the bathrooms were air dryers only (no paper towels)...to this day this is referred to as &quot;The Incident&quot; and always draws massive laughs from everybody.

    - same friend once scored a 1/25 on an A,B,C,D multiple choice test where he actually put down an answer to every question....defied the laws of mathematics, and somehow that fucker still managed to pass the class despite being the most unreal dick to the teacher

    - the chick who sat next to me in a 2 block class had her period once in class. i almost puked, and needless to say the rest of that year was insanely awkward; never was able to look her in the eye again
    Add marc1313 to Rail
  29. so he wiped his ass with his shirt?

    wtf?
    Add XXEDPXX to Rail
  30.  
    Originally Posted by XXEDPXX View Post

    so he wiped his ass with his shirt?

    wtf?

    dude i don't know what the fuck happened in there. he was a really big guy, but i assume he destroyed and disposed of his boxers, and that still wasn't enough, so he did what he had to do...he never fully explained no matter how badly he pressed him. don't really care it's still funny as fuck, and something he'll never live down.
    Add marc1313 to Rail

Similar Threads