so over the summer I spent a lot of time fishing at my buddy's parents' pond, more beer and blunts than anything but we did okay. we had a few catfish grills and even pulled out a couple 8-9 pounders (big for this little lake. it's just a farm pond really but it's decent sized and it's less than a mile from the platte river). but our real interest was the snapping turtles tunnel raping the whole ecosystem. we had anywhere from 5-12 set lines going from june-august set up with raw chicken thighs, under and above the water line. we ended up getting 15 snappers over a couple months, random afternoons here and there.

I remembered these pictures and thought I'd post them. these things are ridiculously dangerous and I wouldn't really suggest going after them unless you're very well prepared or just plain stupid like us.

big thanks to nastysmell for coaching me and helping to control the snapping turtle population in eastern nebraska.


first one we caught ("Ted"). the first night we put set out our lines this guy found some chicken right off the dock. I woke up to my buddy yelling at me to get over there now because he checked the lines in the morning and pulled up this bastard. it was funny because by the time I got there he had jumped back in the water and tangled the line somewhere underwater. apparently he worked himself lose because we caught him again after we gave up and found Todd and Tad.


Todd


Tad


Ted's crib


Tim, caught a different day


turtle leg + tail on the smoker


turtle soup, the "traditional" way, according to the resident old-timers that used to be "miles ahead of us catching turtles." chicken stock, beer, tomatos, and cream. carrots, onions, celery, any hot chili peppers, garlic, sweet potatos, and romas. add some worcestershire, honey and parsley, then bacon and mfing turtle. sour cream to finish. I cooked down the bacon to build a roux, then pretty much made a glorified tomato soup. nothing too fancy but it's delicious and lets the turtle be the star. picture is from before I added the turtle but you get the idea.


it took me 2 attempts to get the turtle meat right. you've really gotta give it 2-3 weeks of clean water and a red meat diet to flush their systems. these beasts can spend decades eating mud and it's def not for everybody. wayyy better than chick fil a tho imo.

if you ever find yourself in this situation... don't listen to them when they tell you it's best to chop off their heads. I decapitated all 3 of the 1st ones (todd, ted, tad) and they were moving for up to 1.5 hours after "death." Tad actually ran away ~20 yards before we noticed his headless body skipping out. the point is a .22 to the head is the most effective and humane way to harvest a snapping turtle.

come at me animal lovers.

turtle soup is some good shit. not sure if i've had snapping turtle soup tho. sure it's all the same.

bonus pics I found:

I forgot what these are called but they're def more rare than snappers or painteds. anybody? we pulled up one but managed to let him go.




grilled catfish


beef/chicken chili I made the other day. "real" chili with chili peppers


whitetail a friend shot yesterday


fuck I sound like a hillbilly

 

Originally Posted by TheWacoKidd

snapping turtles are savage beasts:

dude they are absolutely wicked. not hard to believe they've been around forever.

they actually blow air out of a little hole under the tongue and hiss like a snake. it was weird imagining some of the snappers were probably older than me.

mmmmm, delish due to the spicing.

had a string of blue gills turned to nothing but a string of heads by a snapper.

never skinny dippy in a lake again,

all the food looks dope...btw what happened to the whole restaurant idea you were tossing around?

you can actually see their hisser in that 1st picture.

+1 on the cornmeal breading. I go like 3:1, cornmeal:flour and fry in sweet magical butter. I've deep-fried nuggets but you lose some of the good clean catfish taste. since the grill is more suited to us hillbillies I'd let it marinate skin-on in a foil pouch w/ lemon, soy, black pepper and parsely for just 45-60 minutes. then I liked to smoke it in the foil for 20-30 min before searing up both sides to finish.

 

Originally Posted by Stockage

never skinny dippy in a lake again,

so true, I can swim just fine but I'll never get in a lake. I've seen some shit man

 

Originally Posted by hiroshi_87

It looks like a spiny softshell turtle.

that's it, ty

 

Originally Posted by FenwayKing

all the food looks dope...btw what happened to the whole restaurant idea you were tossing around?

been busy w/ 2 jobs and live poker all year so nothing actively in the direction of opening. I'm working in family member/potential business partner's kitchen and learning a lot about the industry. I still refine the idea all the time and I can now fully appreciate how much I have to learn before I'm confident to open anything with my name on it. tbh at this point in my life I'm pretty happy living off a paycheck and working on my food. I'm a perfectionist and I'll be ready to move forward when I know my food's the best and I'm comfortable with my vision. so I'm still learning but give me 5 years and I should be nearer ready to settle on a plan.

thanks for asking and congrats to you, pius, benba, et al in vegas. sick sick year all around.

I love me some snapper soup.

That being said, I would have no fucking clue where to begin if someone handed me a turtle and said "Here, make me some soup."

Is turtle easy to prepare?

 

Originally Posted by Hank H1LL

it took me 2 attempts to get the turtle meat right. you've really gotta give it 2-3 weeks of clean water and a red meat diet to flush their systems. these beasts can spend decades eating mud and it's def not for everybody. wayyy better than chick fil a tho imo.

so i gotta feed a turtle steak for 2-3 weeks so i can enjoy turtle? hmmm...

food looks dope but damn nature is scary. imagine swimming in a lake and getting your toe ripped off by one of those little fuckers that would suckkkkkkkkkkk

shortly after moving south, i was playing with a small one, not knowing what it was. This thing was no more than 6" long, but he had the mentality of a griz. I pretty much never fucked with them after that.

Never eaten it, but looks so good.

This thread also reminds me of one of my all time favorite movies.

 

Originally Posted by Hank H1LL

come at me animal lovers.

 

Originally Posted by EyeKnows

who speaks for the snapping turtles?

lol @ "fixing" the pond by killing some turtles, you slightly altered it for a little while at best.

conservation dept. propaganda ftw.

.

FYI i do not live on the farm any more. moved to houston for the Fabulous Pussy. i had to give up eating wild things to eat a Wild Thing. +EV let me tell you now.