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Balancing poker and life and love

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  1. ReBinkRiver ReBinkRiver is offline

    Olympia, WA
    United States

    Posts: 315
    Joined: Aug 08

    Mar 4th, 2011 (3/4/2011 7:45pm)

    So I've been playing online poker since I was about 17 across various sites and it's been a low to medium source of income for me. Along with my live play in casinos in the area, I've pretty much been what you consider a professional for ~5 years.

    I also have a web design business/SEO business, along with a fiance, nice place, couple awesome dogs.

    Poker has been taking an emotional impact on my life. I'm in the midst of a four month HORRIBLE run of breaking even/losing a few hundred a day, despite increased volume. I've tried to be honest of my game, watching some of Jcarver's new stuff on VT, talking with friends, checking with my buddies who win ~300k a year what I've done wrong and right, and most of the time it seems I'm not doing anything different than they would for the most part. When I lose, I wake up the next day feeling like shit because I feel like I've been wasting time, and when I win, I'm on top of the world. I've seen my web design/SEO business and clients fall to the wayside and get the worst of the deal. Obv statement: Need to take it more seriously, and just do work.

    It also has been affecting my fiance and I's relationship though, sometimes a mouse will go across the room or a "F*CK" will echo through the house, it scares the dogs + she just doesn't like it.

    My main question and prompt for responses: Is anybody in the same situation either with a fiance/wife/girlfriend, a business or other responsibility, and love playing a lot of poker, but have trouble balancing it? or those of you that have learned how to balance life and poker with some success and still enjoy the game as much as you did, but get more out of life like you used to before poker?

    This should be fun eh
    Edited By: ReBinkRiver Mar 4th, 2011 at 07:48 PM
  2. Polar_Bears Polar_Bears is offline

    Las Vegas, NV
    United States

    Posts: 466
    Joined: Apr 09

    Mar 4th, 2011 (3/4/2011 8:18pm) in reply to ReBinkRiver

    I feel for so many of you out there with families and/or wives/girlfriends....I really have no idea how you do it. I remember when Rizen had kids and the impact it had on his life with having to cut back.

    Not sure what your long term goals are, but I can only speak from my experience. This has been a long, difficult, painful trip. For me it was easy because I was just out of a divorce and no kids, but I realized something about this game...at least for me...I was going to have to give it 100% or nothing at all.

    In my late 20's I had some good friends of mine that were going to med school. I witnessed first hand the sacrifices these guys make to become doctors. For quite a few years you can pretty much kiss your life goodbye in every capacity! These guys were going 20-24 hours a day constantly for years and years! No girlfriends, no social life, nothing but medicine round the clock. It really taught me what the sacrifices somebody has to make to accomplish their dreams!

    I made the decision to apply the same philosophy to poker. I play 10-14 hours a day, study 5-8 hours a day and have been doing this for years, almost 7 days a week. I am nowhere where I want to be yet, but I can see a light at the end of the tunnel finally!

    There is absolutely no way I could of even gotten to this point with significant others in the picture. I am not saying it can't be done, and I assume there are a lot of people out there that just get it much quicker and easier than I did, but my path has been slow, tedious, and long.

    I just look at it as I been going to med school....same effort, same amount of hours, etc...I know in the long run "for me" the thrill of finally becoming a doctor will all be worth it! (not to mention the hot ass nurses you get when you become a doctor ;)

    Would I do it all over again knowing what I know now about the whole thing? You bet your ass!!! But again...no family/kids makes it easy to make that decision.
    Edited By: Polar_Bears Mar 4th, 2011 at 08:20 PM
  3. ReBinkRiver ReBinkRiver is offline

    Olympia, WA
    United States

    Posts: 315
    Joined: Aug 08

    Mar 4th, 2011 (3/4/2011 8:38pm) in reply to Polar_Bears

    Appreciate the post, I recently got a backer so thats how my volume has increased. And I think as far as skill, I'm pretty good imo.

    So it's less of the getting there skill-wise for me, but more getting their mentality wise and realizing how long this might take regardless of how good you are (esp backed, wading in makeup constantly), but the last thing I want to do is sacrifice my fiance, she's the one thing that makes me sleep each night, knowing she's taken care of and her needs are met.
    Thread Starter
  4. slow_rollin78 slow_rollin78 is offline

    Lincoln, NE
    United States

    Posts: 57
    Joined: Oct 07

    Mar 4th, 2011 (3/4/2011 8:38pm) in reply to ReBinkRiver

    Man, it is tough. I have a pretty good system going... Ftilt kind of messed it up w/ there doubles week + ftops though.

    I have a full time job as a financial planner, currently have about 65 - 70 clients (and growing), have a wife, work out every day, and put in decent volume playing poker. On grind evenings/nights I probably only get 4-5 hours of sleep, which is pretty brutal, and can't be too healthy. My wife is in real estate sales so she is busy on the weekends, and I don't do any work appts on weekends, which frees up a ton of poker time. I also play Monday/Wed/Thurs nights (lighter schedule) .. Tuesday I work late.. and Friday I always take off (fixed date night w/ the wife).. Its just 1 big balancing act..
     
  5. ReBinkRiver ReBinkRiver is offline

    Olympia, WA
    United States

    Posts: 315
    Joined: Aug 08

    Mar 4th, 2011 (3/4/2011 8:42pm) in reply to slow_rollin78

    Jeez. My fiance doesn't work currently, the go kart place she worked at went out of business, she was making decent money doing event coordinating for them. She's looking now though, trying to get office space secured for my web design business so I can work there three days a week, meet clients there and put her on the front desk probably.

    You seem to have a grasp on how to go about it though.
    Edited By: ReBinkRiver Mar 4th, 2011 at 08:42 PM
    Thread Starter
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