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Dear Apestyles

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  1. H-Bomb H-Bomb is offline

    Cedar Rapids, IA
    United States

    Posts: 142
    Joined: Dec 05

    Oct 16th, 2007 (10/16/2007 3:19am)

    Please make a video of tonights 100K.

    Sincerely,
    PXF subscribers.

    PS. Take it down.
  2. FishOnTilt FishOnTilt is offline

    Sioux City, IA
    United States

    Posts: 3,279
    Joined: Jan 06

    Oct 16th, 2007 (10/16/2007 3:20am) in reply to H-Bomb

    ill cosign to that.
     
  3. rexmundi1337 rexmundi1337 is offline

    Melbourne
    Australia

    Posts: 790
    Joined: Jun 05

    Oct 16th, 2007 (10/16/2007 3:26am) in reply to H-Bomb

    agreed.... i'd like to see what you kept restealing with from the SB vs powhiteguy's button.
  4. 1.21Gigawatts 1.21Gigawatts is offline

    NY
    United States

    Posts: 12,935
    Joined: Oct 05

    Oct 16th, 2007 (10/16/2007 3:31am) in reply to H-Bomb

    Shave your chest.

    Sincerely,
    the girl from last week.
  5. candida candida is offline

    Posts: 511
    Joined: May 06

    Oct 16th, 2007 (10/16/2007 3:38am) in reply to 1.21Gigawatts

    Dear Apestyles,

    Thank you for all the kamikazes in Aruba.

    Love, GrinderMJ
  6. RtShrubber RtShrubber is offline

    Houston, TX
    United States

    Posts: 1,185
    Joined: Sep 05

    Oct 16th, 2007 (10/16/2007 3:39am) in reply to candida

    lol drunkalated
     
  7. ActionJeff ActionJeff is offline

    Boston, MA
    United States

    Posts: 3,943
    Joined: Oct 05

    Oct 16th, 2007 (10/16/2007 3:41am) in reply to RtShrubber

    Dear Apestyles,

    chest hair.

    respectfully,

    Jeff
    1
  8. Daut44 Daut44 is offline

    Posts: 538
    Joined: Jul 06

    Oct 16th, 2007 (10/16/2007 3:52am) in reply to ActionJeff

    Dear apestyles,

    please dont shave me.

    love,
    chest hair
     
  9. Assassinato Assassinato is offline

    Costa Rica

    Posts: 2,703
    Joined: Sep 06

    Oct 16th, 2007 (10/16/2007 3:53am) in reply to Daut44

    lmao
    239 1 

    Assassinato is an instructor at PocketFives Training . To get more of his advice and to watch his training videos, click here.

  10. FishOnTilt FishOnTilt is offline

    Sioux City, IA
    United States

    Posts: 3,279
    Joined: Jan 06

    Oct 16th, 2007 (10/16/2007 3:56am) in reply to Assassinato

    lololol.

    ape wouldnt be half the man he is without his chest hair and deep voice.
     
  11. pinksock pinksock is offline

    Brandon, MS
    United States

    Posts: 325
    Joined: Oct 05

    Oct 16th, 2007 (10/16/2007 3:57am) in reply to Daut44

    Dear apestyles,

    I agree with chesty. Please dont shave us.

    love and respect,
    back hair
  12. dudeoflife21 dudeoflife21 is offline

    Iowa City, IA
    United States

    Posts: 11
    Joined: Dec 06

    Oct 16th, 2007 (10/16/2007 4:16am) in reply to H-Bomb

    Dear Apestyles...please teach me how to hit 2 outers...
    congrats on your score. the dude abides.
    dudeoflife
  13. amak316 amak316 is offline

    Posts: 2,823
    Joined: Mar 06

    Oct 16th, 2007 (10/16/2007 4:31am) in reply to dudeoflife21

    I cant decide if i respect you for your "dude abides" signature or if i hate you for ruining an awesome line/movie. ill get back to you on the issue later dudeoflife21
     
  14. rocksolid124 rocksolid124 is offline

    Denham Springs, LA
    United States

    Posts: 9,352
    Joined: Sep 06

    Oct 16th, 2007 (10/16/2007 4:47am) in reply to H-Bomb

    Dear Apestyles:

    Boxers or briefs?
  15. soccertease soccertease is offline

    Barrie
    Canada

    Posts: 390
    Joined: Sep 06

    Oct 16th, 2007 (10/16/2007 4:53am) in reply to H-Bomb

    Dear Apestyles,

    Someone started a gay thread about you on P5's

    Some guy,
    Soccertease.
  16. gboro780 gboro780 is offline

    Posts: 3,570
    Joined: Apr 05

    Oct 16th, 2007 (10/16/2007 4:54am) in reply to pinksock

    dear ape,

    let me know the next time you're coming back to the radisson mon, and don't shave ya chest hair.

    - native who stayed with you in aruba
    647 121
  17. dudeoflife21 dudeoflife21 is offline

    Iowa City, IA
    United States

    Posts: 11
    Joined: Dec 06

    Oct 16th, 2007 (10/16/2007 5:02am) in reply to amak316

    The dude is eagerly waiting your approval Amak.
  18. ActionJeff ActionJeff is offline

    Boston, MA
    United States

    Posts: 3,943
    Joined: Oct 05

    Oct 16th, 2007 (10/16/2007 5:05am) in reply to amak316

    That reminds me of a pretty funny Apestyles story from Vegas

    Me, Ape, Kush, Aaron, some others were going out to celebrate Ape winning the FTP $100 6m. After the first club we were getting pretty drunk, so we went to some place called Tangerine. Ape was getting really hammered off of overpriced Dom and Goose while chatting it up with some smokin blonde at our VIP table.

    Despite his drunkenness, Ape's instincts were right on target; the lighter the bottle of Dom got lighter, the more the blonde pulled away from him. So, he did the only thing he could do: he stripped. Ape calmy got up from the table, pulling the blonde with him, and went onto the dance floor. While pelvic thrusting with vigor and ferocity that would have done Eric Prydz proud, Ape began to unbutton his shirt.The blonde stood there in awe. Ape rips his shirt off entirely,breaking every button off at once, throws it at a bouncer, and starts grinding onher. My view was obscured for a minute by some girls running up to the table to get autographs from Kush and give him lapdances*. The next thing I see, the whore is all over apestyles, screaming with passion and fury as she bites at his neck and pulls at his chest hair with all her might. I will tell you right now, that man has fucking iron fibers; I'll be damned if that crazy bitch managed to yank one hair from his jungle of a chest.

    I'd like to say that Ape picked the girl up and we all got layed, but this ain't no fucking fairytale. At some point the glitz and lights and noise became too much for our drunken hero, and Ape began a rampage around the club, knocking over tables, punching douchebags, and chugging liquor, that only ended when three bouncers armed with tasers managed to chase him out the fire exit. We were all kicked out soon afterwards, when Kush nearly got into a fight with Lindsey Lohan's bodyguard.

    I guess I could be pretty pissed off about what happened to me... butit's hard to stay mad, when there's so much beauty in the world.Sometimes I feel like I'm seeing it all at once, and it's too much, myheart fills up like a balloon that's about to burst... And then Iremember to relax, and stop trying to hold on to it, and then it flowsthrough me like rain and I can't feel anything but gratitude for everysingle moment of my stupid little life.... it was one of those nights.

    -Jeff

    *(some parts of this story are fictional. Some are not. It is up to youto guess what's real and what's the product of my deranged imagination)
    1
  19. SICKTIGHT311 SICKTIGHT311 is offline

    Long Beach, CA
    United States

    Posts: 24,818
    Joined: Jul 06

    Oct 16th, 2007 (10/16/2007 5:38am) in reply to ActionJeff

    LOL Jeff, great story.
  20. Camronius Camronius is offline

    Beerse
    Belgium

    Posts: 4,804
    Joined: Jul 07

    Oct 16th, 2007 (10/16/2007 5:56am) in reply to gboro780

    Dear ape,

    Please don't listen to these fools. Shave your chest hairs and glue them on me.

    Sincerely,

    Your balls.
  21. Disrespect Disrespect is offline

    Adelaide
    Australia

    Posts: 1,608
    Joined: Nov 05

    Oct 16th, 2007 (10/16/2007 6:24am) in reply to soccertease

    lol with stories like that fuck I'm glad you're back Jeff :).

    oh and Ape's sickness makes me feel funny, like when we used to climb the rope in gym class.
  22. warden warden is offline

    Tucson, AZ
    United States

    Posts: 15,532
    Joined: Apr 06

    Oct 16th, 2007 (10/16/2007 6:28am) in reply to ActionJeff

    fjdl;kaflk;jdl;kjf he def beat me HU
     2
  23. apestyles apestyles is offline Moderator

    Vancouver
    Canada

    Posts: 5,087
    Joined: Sep 05

    Oct 16th, 2007 (10/16/2007 6:30am) in reply to SICKTIGHT311

    That story is only slightly fictional.

    I love that movie though.

    burp

    excuse me
     282 12 

    apestyles is an instructor at PocketFives Training . To get more of his advice and to watch his training videos, click here.

  24. apestyles apestyles is offline Moderator

    Vancouver
    Canada

    Posts: 5,087
    Joined: Sep 05

    Oct 16th, 2007 (10/16/2007 6:44am) in reply to warden

    that was the fictional part
     282 12 
  25. Mr_BigQueso Mr_BigQueso is offline

    Melbourne
    Australia

    Posts: 6,132
    Joined: Mar 07

    Oct 16th, 2007 (10/16/2007 8:57am) in reply to H-Bomb

    dear apestyles,

    I heard a rumor that you used to put your chesthair into little pony tails as you went through a "sexual identity phase" in the seventh grade. truth?

    sincerely,
    patty mayonaise
    572 1
  26. lockdownpokah lockdownpokah is offline

    United States

    Posts: 2,289
    Joined: Sep 07

    Oct 16th, 2007 (10/16/2007 11:05am) in reply to ActionJeff

    I'd like to say that Ape picked the girl up and we all got layed, but this ain't no fucking fairytale.

    ^^^lmao that shit's classic
     
  27. H-Bomb H-Bomb is offline

    Cedar Rapids, IA
    United States

    Posts: 142
    Joined: Dec 05

    Oct 16th, 2007 (10/16/2007 11:37am) in reply to H-Bomb

    This thread is funny shit. Now I know why he's called ape.
    Thread Starter
  28. Camz Camz is offline

    Lafayette, LA
    United States

    Posts: 12,418
    Joined: May 06

    Oct 16th, 2007 (10/16/2007 11:44am) in reply to H-Bomb

    Dear Apestyles,

    I don't want no rubber jumpsuit.

    Sincerely,
    your Penix
  29. fetaman fetaman is offline

    Holy See (Vatican City State)

    Posts: 3,259
    Joined: Oct 06

    Oct 16th, 2007 (10/16/2007 11:50am) in reply to ActionJeff

    SOTY - tears in my eyes...

    Ope Sao - the man is a legend, and a great contributor to the game of poker, and all the associated 'misclicks' that partake.

    Clearly the fictional part was the D&G - it is never overpriced...
  30. donkkkkk donkkkkk is offline

    Canada

    Posts: 546
    Joined: May 07

    Oct 16th, 2007 (10/16/2007 11:57am) in reply to H-Bomb

    Dear Ape,

    Please shave your ass. Thanks
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