Off Topic Post

According to Carrie (my woman) I have changed over the last 4.5 months I've been in Korea.

I'm not much for drama, however it seems as though I can't get shit right. It's almost like I'm cursed in relationships. Not that being in the Army helps any. I mean, my marriage lasted 4 years and ended promptly after I returned from a deployment (because she felt the need to fuck her ex boyfriend while I was gone, and she was pregnant with my daughter...yeah I know....I know)

It seemed I was in a relationship with a great woman when I first came to Korea. Now, however, there seems to be a problem. Everything took a nosedive about two weeks ago. She's depressed because we're so far apart. She calls and I'm not in my room to take the call because I am out getting some thing to eat, watching a free movie in the base theater, or at the gym...so she gets upset. She says I don't talk much on the phone, and I don't take her feelings into consideration because I don't listen to her (or at least she thinks I'm not listening). I think the little things become bigger when you can't actually confront them in person with each other. I don't see them as a big deal and am used to being away for extended periods of time. She is not used to it, was never in the military, and has never been involved with somebody who's been gone for more than a week...if that.

So I am going home the first week of May, and have planned a weekend at a resort in Orlando for when she picks me up at the airport. She knows about this. What she does not know, is that I also made arrangements for a cruise the following week, which she took off because I am coming home. So I'm driving to Virginia for 5 days the 3rd week I'm home to see family and friends...she's supposed to come along and is aware of that as well. BUT...I am now told she's not sure how she feels about all of this right now, and she's not sure if she can deal with it for another 6 months after I leave in May to come back. Also, that she isn't sure I'm the same person, and that she doesn't want to wait for something that may be a lost cause because we're too different than when I first left. "I have some things to think about" she says.
 
WHAT THE FUCK? Are you serious? So now I'm supposed to wait around while she thinks about if it's worth it for her to wait for me? Here's an idea for you Carrie...if you have to think about it...FORGET IT! Seriously, how do you commit to somebody, and just decide you can't handle it. I'm getting out of the Army (not for her mind you, but because I want to), my whole life is going to change, and we won't have to deal with this shit anymore if you can just tough it out for another 7 months or so (because I'm home for one month in between now and when I'm out). Am I supposed to wait around like I'm on trial for a fucking verdict, while you "think about some things" and get back to me with the decision YOU made for US? Fuck that IMO. I'm about to say hit the road.

I'm sure I left a lot out of this, but that's the bottom line for the most part. At least, that's how I feel about it.

Thoughts OT?

(I know everybody is going to say she's fucking somebody else and doesn't want to deal with me coming home...blah blah, she's a whore, blah blah...I know everybody will say that. Let's assume these feelings are solely based on our situation and nobody else is involved. I'd appreciate that. kthx)

Sorry...cliffnotes:

Relationship with woman and had to come to Korea
Little shit turns into big shit because of distance
Going home in May, planned resort vacation in Orlando and cruise/road trip with her
She says she needs to think about things and isn't sure how she feels
I am pissed because I have to wait for her to figure out what she wants? Fuck that IMO