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CarbonPoker · Full Tilt · Cake Poker · PokerStars · Ultimate Bet · Players Only · Bodog
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gpop21 was kind enough to offer up $50 to add to the prize pool as a thank you for helping out his big sister and nephew. mikeyry is adding $20 to this too. we'll keep it at 1st-2nd-3rd 50%-30%-20%
now for the bounties..let's make this tourney fun! i'll start off and put a $2 bounty on all of the OT ladies who play
*if you win a bounty or added money, it is your choice whether you want to keep it or donate it*
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$10 bounty on me. hostile i can ship you a buck on stars if you want to play. can help anyone else out as well as long as you can ship $ to tsx on ft or cake
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Mr323
(United States)
3,310
Posts.
Joined
11-08-2007.
11-01-2009 4:18 PM
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3.23 bounty on me......not much but if you knock me out ship to tsxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
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what's the plan for online bustos but IRL ballas?
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 jtown1010: | |
what's the plan for online bustos but IRL ballas?
Perhaps a paypal account could be set up for Hya & Jacob...? Just an idea. I know paypal money transfers are safe and really simple.
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i only have money on FTP fml
I sent you One hundred and ten cents
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$1 Bounty for each person that you knock out who is mentioned in one of my old school OT poems http://www.pocketfives.com/poker-forums/13/gtfo-die-1284014?pageindex=3
sung to the tune of "American Pie"
A long, long time ago...I can still remember how that OT used to make me smile.
And I knew if I wrote my posts
That I could make them laugh the most
And maybe they'd be happy for a while.
But late March made me shiver
With every link I clicked, I'd quiver -
Bad news bold in headlines,
Portents, omens, bad signs.
I can't remember if I cried when I
Read about the site's demise,
But something touched me deep inside
The day that OT died.
So bye, bye get the fuck out and die,
Drove my K-car to the gay bar and found that BGX guy,
The OT old schoolers were drinkin' whiskey and rye
Singin' "This is my last gtfo, die!'
This is my last gtfo, die!'"
Did you write a heated thread?
And have you read something by Steve the Dedhead?
Have you discussed Wowswifts monthly flow?
And do you believe Buckinator had to go?
Can OT save your mortal soul?
And can you teach me Photoshop real slow?
Well I knew that you liked menz most ghey
When SaulGood blew a kiss your way -
You rubbed each others' necks,
Its never a scam, buttsecks.
I was a loser college lout
With useless facts and a pocketfives account,
But I was fucked, I had no doubt,
The day the OT died.
I started singin'...
Bye, bye Get the fuck out and die,
Drove my K-car to the gay bar and found that WhiteAL guy,
The old school OTers were drinkin' whiskey and rye
Singin' "This is my last gtfo, die!'
This is my last gtfo die!'"
Now for two years we've been on our own
With no one left to shout 'F Bertminatti
But that's not how it used to be.
When Readzie marched out to his chopper
After Lip Herpes and Bankroll problems
And Nicky begged to see Wow's snapper
With Wowswift doublefisting 2 cups,
Shots of Tim Caums stache, they went up,
The 5 year olds asses, they were kicked
MS Paint posts were clicked.
And while king was crowned, it was Thor
And Victimitis, attention whore
Chuck Norris jokes, they did bore
The day that OT died.
We were singin'
Bye, bye get the fuck out and die,
Drove my K-car to the gay bar and found that Wein guy,
The oldschool OTers were drinkin' whiskey and rye
Singin' "This is my last gtfo, die!'
This is my last gtfo, die!'"
Sports posts, "whats your favorite" posts, on the front page sucking,
The noobs popped up, we tried to raise but they werent mucking
Content-free posts out the ass
That pope ate baked goods, wein had gas,
The noobs grew, made a march en masse,
While TC applied tanning lotion, hes got class.
Join Gidders get free Balloons
Giga didnt know how to use itunes,
We all got up to rail
Turns out Victimitis was a male
'Cause the noobs filled up the page,
Their shitty posts drew Wowswifts rage,
Did you see Buckinator turnover in his grave?
The day that OT died?
We started singing
Bye, bye get the fuck out and die,
Drove my K-car to the gay bar and found that mrblonde guy
The oldschool OTers were drinkin' whiskey and rye
Singin' "This is my last gtfo, die!'
This is my last gtfo, die!'"
In there we were all safe to lurk
A generation bored at work
With no hope for promotions then,
So come on, Brian McLaughlin, save this joint,
He made posts with a point
And as I read my new replies,
The anger built up deep inside,
No writer born in hell
Could break that JJProdigy spell.
And as the flame war burned all through the night,
With bullshit taunts thrown from the political left and right,
I saw sepslugseven laughing with delight
The day that OT died.
We started singing
Bye, bye get the fuck out and die,
Drove my K-car to the gay bar and found that gambowler guy,
The old school OTers were drinkin' whiskey and rye
Singin' "This is my last gtfo, die!'
This is my last gtfo, die!'"
I met a girl who sang the blues,
I asked if I could see her boobs,
She told me she was Seykota.
I Googled "pwnd" once again,
The way I had when this began,
But the engine said the query went astray.
And on the 'net the writers screamed,
The pancake rabbits cried and steves cats dreamed,
But not a picture was posted,
The uploads weren't hosted.
And the most loved men, they numbered three:
Murderer, BGX, and Mhoddi.
They walked through the far-strewn debris
The day the OT died.
They were singin'
Bye, bye get the fuck out and die,
Drove my K-car to the gay bar and found that MUPP guy,
The old school oters were drinkin' whiskey and rye
Singin' "This is my last gtfo, die!'
This is my last gtfo, die!'"
We were singin'
Bye, bye get the fuck out and die,
Drove my K-car to the gay bar and found that agriff guy
The old school oters were drinkin' whiskey and rye
Singin' "This is my last gtfo, die!'"
Ocho Cinco
TimCaum should sing this
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or
http://www.pocketfives.com/poker-forums/13/a-poem-about-ot-1345716/p/1345716#1345716
'Twas the day before Christmas, and all through the night,
Jasmith85 wasted time on OT, "I have no life!"
The stockings were hung by the chimney, ho hum
In hopes that St. Nick's fat ass would soon come
oBOBCATu was nestled all snug in his bed,
While visions of children danced in his head
And while surfing and drinking, I was bored as junk,
I took one last sip, then passed out drunk.
When out on the lawn, there were moans and such,
I was awoken from the barking of my one-eyed mutt
I jumped up quickly and turned off the radio,
Walked to the door and stepped in a bowl of Spaghettios.
And what to my mutt's wondering eye should appear,
But OT's own Gambowler, that homo, that fag, that queer.
As he adjusted his cone tities, I adjusted my contact lens,
"I'm here for the party. I saw the sign ATTN GHEY MENZ."
oBOB peeked from his room, "Did Santa bring me boys?"
"Shutup, BOB", I said, "Or you won't get any toys."
Holy shit, I forgot. The OT party's tonight.
I need to clean up, this place wasn't a pleasant sight.
A few hours later, the party was popping,
OTers were drinking, partying and dropping.
Wein had material for his highest replied post in some time,
The post's replies? It had 9.
Everybody was enjoying themselves, when I heard turned around
And heard the knocker on my door make another sound
I stepped over Mr.Blonde, who was passed out from caffeine(not alcohol)
While drunk ass Buckinator picked a fight with the wall.
"Nice knocker", said Action Jeff, mine's made of brass.
"That might explain", I said, "why you don't get any ass."
"Very funny," he said. "But I have the last laugh..
Because last night, I slept with your dad."
"Merry Christmas everyone!", Amymarie1967 screamed.
"Who brought the chips? I've got homemade sour cream!"
In walked Gank, that crazy pompous pig.
"I PWN IN P5's, NOW YOU ALL SUCK MY DICK!"
In the back room, Hyacinthgirl got pregnant again.
How many is that now? 8? 9? Maybe 10?
Who's the daddy? I knew from the start.
I'm not naming any names-- Cough, cough, Bert.
Another hour later, again I answered the door.
In my presence, stood my one and only Lord.
"Your Lord, Saviour, the Son of Christ is here..
Now where are the bitches? There had better be some beer!"
"Oh my Dad!," Jesus exclaimed.
"Smirnoff Ice? This is why I came!"
Who let in the ugly guy? This is what I feared.
You can find that ugly mug pictured here. (http://www.pocketfives.com/B37375FE-DF67-44A5-BE73-DFD666D821BC.aspx)
Jesus pissed in a cup as he toked on his bud.
"Hey Trafficking! Drink this, for this is my blood!"
He pulled down his pants, that boy is naughty,
"Hey GBMantis! Eat this, for this is my body!"
Murderer showed up with a girl and a gay,
To make himself more available, he started swinging both ways.
Murderer's a nut, what can I do?
He spent the rest of the night making out with oBOBCATu
Seykota told stories as her eyes glistened.
But it was so boring that nobody listened.
Chocothunder puffed out his chest, guarding the door,
While Zee7 and Gamaitec made out on the floor.
Flashover spoke up, holding up money.
"I bet Zee writes a post about this-- and it won't be funny."
Mhoddi came in, not too friendly.
"I need to drop a yuletide log down the porcelain chimney"
Presents were traded, so was food.
I got nothing, which I found somewhat crude.
OMG_LOL_WTF got an plastic wowswift vagina, but he didn't know what to do.
But it's okay. SaulGood can show him because he got one too.
Utterzcar isnt a czar, that lying prick.
Lenny didn't show up, the self absorbed dick.
that Pope told interesting stories, Xmas32 fucked and cussed.
Jet Jet Jet showed up, but nobody knew who he was.
All of a sudden, Santa bust through the wall.
''OHH YEAH!! HAPPY HOLIDAYS TO ALL!"
"Merry Christmas, Santa", I said as he lingered.
His rosy cheeks turned redder as he gave me the finger.
His eyes glazed over. Folks, Santa had lost it.
"I prefer 'Happy Holidays', he said. Santa was agnostic.
Jesus was near and heard him say this.
"Dad damnit!", spewed Jesus. "Now I'm pissed."
"You want some?", asked Santa. "You stupid ass jew."
"Bring it", responded Jesus. "I'll rapture all over you."
Jesus and Santa fought all over the place.
In the end, Jesus raptured Santa's face.
Kris Kringle, sighing, jumped in his sleigh.
The only one to leave the party without getting laid.
"Now Dasher, now Dancer, Now prancer and the rest!
Now Hawkhill and Dedheadsteve, and Seal and MBus28!
Santa forgot the reindeers' names or so it seemed.
But it doesn't really matter, he was smashed off Jim Beam.
Agriffrod read poems, Bmac entertained,
While wowswift and Thorladen tried to explain the stain.
"It's mayonnaise", they both sweared.
The blue dress on wowswift was fixed with all stares.
FlyersGuy, Mr. Blonde, Clizzark I don't remember.
But I figured I'd mention them, because, hell, it's December.
ISuck123 showed everyone how their brag posts should be modeled.
In the meantime, misterizx was hit with a bottle.
After the party, 1.21Gigawatts was met with his fate.
The girl he took home, he had to inflate.
BGX showed up, NickyPrice and Octan could be found.
But 55AllIn55 couldn't make it, for he's in the pound.
Victimitis, Daddypoe, SluggerWV all made it!
rivermonkey didn't show up, for almost everyone there she dated.
Riverkiller, Fitz420, both danced with WhiteAlRoker.
While Jehricoholic and 2 Guns Up argued pointlessly with eachother.
If you don't understand this poem, I feel sorry for you,
For that means that you are nothing but a mere newb.
This party will be remembered by one and all,
but mostly for turning franktank back to alcohol
If I forgot to mention you, I don't care, your name isn't worth a dime.
You can write your own poem and mention your name a million times.
Santa finally recovered enough to guide the sleigh,
As he flew off, you could hear him say--
"Merry Christmas my ass, you can all go to hell!
Ho Ho Ho Ho! ROFL!!11"
-Jasmith85
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pretty sad that not one of these guys is playing, and saulgood is the only one who donated
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ess286
(United States)
16,456
Posts.
Joined
10-02-2005.
11-01-2009 4:54 PM
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I put a bounty on myself for $28.60. Keep in mind that i have to leave for work no later than 9:15pm so if I am stil in around then I will be shoving.
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ehh be late...you could tell them you are theoretically working..saving lives all the same..
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I may have to sit out, but if I do not, I am adding a $50 bounty on myself, I hope you donate half to the charity..... If you get knocked out 10th(favorite number), I will stake you in a 109 freeze on stars or the $75 on tilt, they have a few of these daily, standard stake back, then 50-50 split, you must donate 20% of ur winnings to the charity and I will donate 20% also..... GL ALL
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| tsxxx04: | |
ehh be late...you could tell them you are theoretically working..saving lives all the same..
Or, do what I did, bring laptop to work and be a slacker!
This is the first time I won't be able to open NSFW threads! LOL
*here's hoping my laptop doesn't get stolen if I have to leave it unattended! :-)*
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$5 on myself and another $5 to jacob's fund. $20 each if you genuinely slowroll when you bust TWK (AK on a ATJ23 board isnt a slowroll, AA on A88XX board is). Also $5 on Etrain99
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Braaak
(United States)
2,215
Posts.
Joined
02-03-2007.
11-01-2009 6:55 PM
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In reply to
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$4.44 bounty on me. I'm very tired so this one will go fast.
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at least 8 more people need to GTFI!!!!!!!
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Reech
(United States)
9,611
Posts.
Joined
06-16-2007.
11-01-2009 7:10 PM
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off to a good start
PokerStars Game #34805839412: Tournament #208231285, $1.00+$0.10 USD Hold'em No Limit - Level I (10/20) - 2009/11/01 20:06:34 ET
Table '208231285 12' 9-max Seat #9 is the button
Seat 1: jpe99 (1420 in chips)
Seat 2: ChocoThunder (890 in chips)
Seat 3: BekiGirl (1490 in chips)
Seat 4: BlueDemonJJ (2180 in chips)
Seat 5: Siefert (1360 in chips)
Seat 6: Autolobotomy (1470 in chips)
Seat 7: aad0906 (1690 in chips)
Seat 8: LadyLuck84 (1470 in chips) is sitting out
Seat 9: pigalet42 (1470 in chips)
jpe99: posts small blind 10
ChocoThunder: posts big blind 20
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Autolobotomy said, "we are monopolizing the OT tail"
BekiGirl: folds
BlueDemonJJ: folds
Siefert: raises 40 to 60
Autolobotomy: folds
aad0906: folds
LadyLuck84: folds
pigalet42: calls 60
jpe99: folds
ChocoThunder: calls 40
*** FLOP *** [Qc Ts 5d]
ChocoThunder: checks
Siefert: bets 100
pigalet42: raises 160 to 260
ChocoThunder: folds
Siefert: raises 160 to 420
ChocoThunder said, "tytytytytyty"
jpe99 said, "ty"
pigalet42: raises 990 to 1410 and is all-in
Siefert: calls 880 and is all-in
Uncalled bet (110) returned to pigalet42
*** TURN *** [Qc Ts 5d] [3s]
ChocoThunder said, "PWNT"
*** RIVER *** [Qc Ts 5d 3s] [Kd]
*** SHOW DOWN ***
Siefert: shows [Ah Ac] (a pair of Aces)
pigalet42: shows [5c 5h] (three of a kind, Fives)
pigalet42 collected 2790 from pot
ChocoThunder said, "pz"
*** SUMMARY ***
Total pot 2790 | Rake 0
Board [Qc Ts 5d 3s Kd]
Seat 1: jpe99 (small blind) folded before Flop
Seat 2: ChocoThunder (big blind) folded on the Flop
Seat 3: BekiGirl folded before Flop (didn't bet)
Seat 4: BlueDemonJJ folded before Flop (didn't bet)
Seat 5: Siefert showed [Ah Ac] and lost with a pair of Aces
Seat 6: Autolobotomy folded before Flop (didn't bet)
Seat 7: aad0906 folded before Flop (didn't bet)
Seat 8: LadyLuck84 folded before Flop (didn't bet)
Seat 9: pigalet42 (button) showed [5c 5h] and won (2790) with three of a kind, Fives
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